It's gonna be me
by Dark Goddess
Summary: Another Relena bashing story where she tries to steal Heero from Duo. shounen ai. Rated for language.


Disclaimer and Warning: Gundamn Wing ain't mine, neither is "It's gonna be me" they belong to Sunshine and Bandai and NSYNC and all those other people. So, don't sue me cause I ain't got no money. You'll be wasting money on lawyers and stuff for no reason. Also this story is a yaoi, meaning boy love. And at times the song will change to fit the plot. If you don't like it fuck off. Flames will be posted and laughed at. One more thing when I wrote this I was high on Haagen-Dazs Rum Raisin ice cream.

It's Gonna be me!

Relena Peacecraft walked up to the door of Quatre estate. She knocked hard on the door. In a few seconds a very happy Quatre greeted her. She didn't say a word, she just pushed the blond out of her way and walked into the house.

Quatre closed the door quickly and followed her. He never had seen such an angry look in the girl's eyes. He knew that look very well. She wanted something and she was prepared to fight for that thing. He knew exactly what she was after and whom she going to fight. 

He shook his head and sighed as he followed the Queen of Earth. This was going to be one noise precession. He was fairly certain that someone was going to leave with a bloody nose or worse, dead. Then he remembered that there were two other very sensible pilots in the house besides himself and that they would help him keep the peace.

Relena stormed into the living room where, she found the other four Gundamn pilots. Heero and Duo were sitting on the floor their legs intertwined as they played video games while Trowa and Wufei were sitting at the small table—playing chess. She stomped her way over to Heero and Duo.

Wufei and Trowa sighed and stood up. They moved behind the couch, where they knew they'd be safer. Then they began to watch the proceeding as Quatre entered the room.

Trowa saw Quatre and motioned him to come over. Quatre nodded and walked over to them. Trowa put his arm around the smaller boy's waist and pulled him close.

"Quatre, don't say or do anything." Trowa said, "Just let them handle this."

"But Relena's going to…" The Winner heir began. 

"I know but if we interfere this will never end." Trowa said. Wufei nodded. Quatre sighed and nodded. He began to pray that his carpet wouldn't be stained with blood because a certain pacifist wouldn't realize that a certain boy was in love with another boy.

Quatre sighed again remembering the day the Relena caught Duo and Heero having sex in the laundry room. He thought that Relena had finally gotten the clue and would stop chasing Heero around. He was wrong, it now seemed that the Peacecraft girl was even more determined to make the pilot of the Wing Zero hers. It was going to be a long day.

Relena stepped in front of the two teenagers. They looked up at her and rolled their eyes.

"Relena, what are you doing her?" Heero asked coldly.

"You! Get your hands away from him, you pervert!!!" Relena bellowed. Duo looked at the girl with his most innocent eyes.

"Me?" He asked pointing to himself. "I'm not a pervert! How can you call me a pervert? I'm not the one chasing Heero around all the time, even after he threatened to kill you."   
Steam began to emerge from the blonde's head. She gave Duo an icy glare that would match even Heero's most coldest glare. Then she did something that no one was expecting. 

She sang….

_You might've been hurt babe_

__

That ain't no lie

You've seen them come and go, oh 

Duo arched and eyebrow as he watched her begin little song and dance. She moved quickly over to the couple sitting on the floor and grabbed Duo's arm. The she pulled him away from Heero. She sat down next to him and continued.

_I remember you told me_

That it made you believe in 

No man, no cry

Maybe that's why 

Relena put her arms around Heero's neck, ignoring his glares and death threats. When he began to squirm she held him tighter. She continued her song.

_Every little thing I do_

Never seems enough for you 

Quatre let out a yelp when the room began to morph. On every wall there was a scene playing. Everyone looked at the scene completely dumbfounded. 

They saw Relena talking to Heero. His back turned to her, and then he turned around and pointed a gun to her head. Relena looked on in complete shock as Heero threatened to kill her. 

"Hey, I know this!" Duo called out, happily watching the proceedings on what were once the walls of the Winner estate. "This is when me and Heero first met!"

Heero grunted as he watched Duo shot him in the leg and arm. He glared at Duo. Duo put his hands in front of his face.

"Don't look at me like that, Heero!!" Duo called out, "I thought Relena was in trouble. I didn't know who was the bad guy. It was an accident." Heero grunted again.

"Later Duo." He said. Duo swallowed hard and put a hand on his bottom. He already knew what was going to happen and he wasn't going to like it. 

On the screen Relena could be seen standing in front of Heero, protecting him from Duo. Duo shook his head. Only Relena would protect a guy who's trying to kill her from a guy who was trying to help her.

Heero was beginning to get annoyed. The walls kept repeating scene of Relena's greatest moment and Duo worst. He pulled a crowbar out of his shorts and tried to pry Relena off him. She grabbed on tightly to him and began to sing again.

_You don't wanna lose it again_

But I'm not like them 

"Them?" Duo asked becoming jealous. "Who's them?" Heero sighed and continued his new mission to pry Relena off himself. "Heero, you never told me about them! You told me I was your first! You lied to me! Heero, answer me!"

_Baby, when you finally _

Get to love somebody 

Guess what

It's gonna be me 

Duo gasped. His violet eyes spilling over with tears. He sniffled hard and stood up. He walked over to Heero, who was still trying to pry Relena off.

"You're a liar, Heero Yuy!" Duo cried. Heero looked at him with confusion in his Prussian eyes.

"Duo, what are you talking about?" Heero asked as he threw away the crowbar and pulled a jackhammer from his shorts. He began looking for a plug.

"You said you loved me!" Duo cried out, "But now I find out you're not in love with anyone and there were others besides me." Duo began to cry. "How could you, Heero? How could you lie to me?" 

"Duo no baka." Heero said looking for some explosives. He was going to blast Relena off him. 

"Oh, now I'm a baka!" Duo yelled out, "You lie to me and call me names!" Duo waited for an answer and received a grunt. "Fine! I might be baka. But this baka isn't staying with you. I HATE YOU!!!!" With that said Duo turned around and began to leave. Surprisingly, he found the door and walked out. The images disappeared and the room came back to normal.

"How?" Wufei asked. Trowa and Quatre shrugged.

"Duo!" Heero said as he stood up. He was finally able to pry Relena off. He began to go after Duo, when she ran in front of him and stopped him. "Relena, move I gotta go find Duo, before he does something stupid." Relena frowned. She wasn't moving, she had to get with Heero, it was her soul mission in life. Forget that making a peaceful world crap. It was Heero and only Heero she cared about and now with Duo gone, she was one step closer. All she had to do was keep Heero from catching up to Duo and she'd win.

_You've got no choice babe _

"Duo." Heero reminded her as he maneuvered around her. Relena sneered, how dare he mention that name in the middle of her song. She ran in front of him again.

_But to move on, you know_

There ain't no time to waste, 'cause you're just

Too blind to see 

_But in the end you know it's gonna be me_

You can't deny

So just tell me why 

"No! You're to blind to see." Heero said pushing her out of the way. She fell to the floor with a loud thump. "I'm GAY. HO-MO-SEX-UAL! I don't want you. You don't appeal to me. You're annoying. Go away!!!" 

Relena watched as Heero ran out of the room. She began to growl. What did Duo have that she didn't? She stood up and began to give to chase. There was no way she was going to lose Heero. What ever spell that baka Deathscythe pilot put on her Heero she would remove it. Even if it meant killing Duo in the process. 

Heero ran through the forest looking for Duo. Behind him he could hear Relena. She was getting close. He was impressed by how fast she was. He didn't take her for the athletic type. Though, there was no way he was going to let Relena catch him.

Heero looked around, he knew that Duo had come this way. He could see the broken twigs and branches, he saw the footprints. He could almost hear his sobs. 

"Duo no baka!" Heero said still running through the forest, "Why do I put up with you?" 

Relena found Duo first. She found him sitting by a small pond, his legs pressed against his chest. He was crying. She smiled, his pain was her happiness. 

She looked around, it was prefect. Heero was no where to be found. It was the prefect moment to get rid of her rival.

She walked slowly to him and smiled. She picked up a rock and moved slowly towards the boy. 

Duo wiped away the tears from his eyes and continued to sniffle. He then heard: _crunch, crunch, crunch_. Duo turned around just in time to see Relena standing behind him holding a rock.

"Relena you bi—" Relena hit him hard with the rock before he could finish his sentence. Duo fell to the floor with a loud thump. Relena looked down at Duo limp body and smiled. 

Heero ran towards the pond that Duo had shown him a while ago. It was where they celebrated their three-month anniversary. He knew that Duo would be there. It was the only logical place he could be. There was no where else for him to go, well there was but Duo was broke and couldn't go anywhere without Quatre's help.

He came up to the clearing where the pond was and found Relena dragging Duo's unconscious body into the lake. Heero growled and ran towards her. He couldn't believe she'd go so far as to try and drown Duo.

"Relena, what are you doing?" Heero hollered. He pulled Duo away form her and then wrapped his arms around the boy's waist. He began to lug the Duo back to shore.

Relena stood up and looked at her wet dress. She sneered and walked towards Heero and Duo. She watched as Heero caressed the still unconscious body of Duo Maxwell. 

She moved towards them and began to sing her song.

_Every little thing I do _

Never seems enough for you

Heero looked up at her and glared. He began to spit out death threats. He continued to cradle Duo in his arms as Relena continued her song and dance.

_You don't wanna lose it again_

But I'm not like them

Baby, when you finally 

Get to love somebody 

Guess what 

It's gonna be me 

Heero put Duo down softly and walked towards the girl. His fingers coiled around her shirt and he lifted her up. He stared into her eyes. 

"Listen Relena." Heero said, "I don't know what the Hell's wrong with you, but if you ever come any where near Duo again, I am personally going to rip your head off and play kick ball with it. Got me?" Relena began to giggle.

"Oh Heero, I just love it when you say such sweet things to me." Relena said still giggling and blushing. 

Heero dropped Relena and began to walk away slowly. Relena's fixation on him was finally starting to scare him. He just wanted to pick Duo up and get as far away from that lunatic Peacecraft as humanely possible. A feet he could achieve because we all know that Heero Yuy is *not* human. 

Duo sat up and began to groan. He rubbed his aching head and began to look around. He looked at Heero and Relena. Upon seeing them Duo began to remember what happened. He stood and ran towards Relena.

"Relena you bitch, you hit me!!!!" Duo bellowed as he lunged at her. Relena yelped and jumped back. Heero grabbed Duo before he could get anywhere near the girl and held him tightly. 

"Duo, calm down." Heero said.

"No, I'm tired of her." Duo yelled, "First, tries to steal MY, you hear that bitch? My man and then she hits me with a fuckin' rock."

"Duo.."

"Let me go. Let me go so I can ram my thermal scythe up her—"

"DUO!!!!"

"I'll show her whose man you are." 

Relena glared at the seething braided boy. How dare he say such things to her? Her of all people, Relena Peacecraft the Queen of the World. How dare that L2 street rat ever think he was better then her?

_There comes a day_

When I'll be the one 

You'll see

It's gonna…. _gonna….gonna… gonna…gonna…_

Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked for the other voices that had interrupted Relena. They found Relena's little fan club standing on a large rock wearing pink and white spandex. Each one was holding a pink microphone. 

"What are you doing here?" Relena asked.

"Why we're your back up, of course." Said one as she threw another pink microphone at Relena. "Catch!"

"Ms. Relena, we're cheering you on." Said another.

"Yes, show that faggot who's the best." Another said. "We'll help." 

"And for you out there that are reading this just remember that when we sing it shows up in violet and when we sing together with Ms. Relena it's in dark blue." Said the first girl before turning back to Relena. "Go on, finish your part." Relena nodded.

_It's gonna be me_

As Relena said these words her drenched clothes changes into a beautiful pink and white gown. Her hair was up with a crown on top. Glitter shined off her body as she moved. She continued to sing.

_All that I do_

It's not enough for you

Don't wanna lose it 

But I'm not like that

When finally (finally) you get love (to love)

Guess what…Guess what…Guess what…Guess what

Duo wrapped his arms around Heero and buried his head in his lover's chest. Heero also wrapped his arms around Duo holding him close.

"Heero, I'm scared." Duo whispered.

"It's all right, Duo. I'll protect you." Heero said softly

"No Heero. I've never been scared of anything before until this exact moment." 

__

Every little thing I do

__

Never seems enough for you (for you babe) 

_ _

Relena's little fan club jumped off the rock and surrounded the frightened couple. They began to circle them as they continued to sing. They flapped their arms and jumped around while kicking their legs. 

__

You don't wanna lose it again (don't wanna lose it)

The three girls grabbed Duo and wrenched him away from Heero. Duo kicked and screamed as two of the girls pulled him away.

Heero was about to give chase when the other girl grabbed him—and with the power of a fangirl that wants to see her idol happy—dragged him over to a blushing Relena. The other two girls returned and pushed Heero and Relena together and continued their song.

_But I'm not like them _

Baby, when you finally

Get to love somebody (love) 

Guess what

Heero tried to remove himself form Relena but she held him tightly. She wasn't going to let him get away this time. 

_It's gonna be her _

Heero continued to squirm as Relena leaned into kiss him. He struggled and clamped his mouth shut. There was no way he was going to let that psycho kiss him. His lips belonged to Duo and only Duo and even if he was going to kiss some one else it wasn't gonna be her. 

Relena little fan club continued to sing and dance around the couple. 

_Every little thing I do_

Never seems enough for you (for you )

You don't wanna lose it again (don't wanna lose it)

But I'm not like them

Baby, when you finally 

Get to love somebody (love somebody)

Guess what 

"IT AIN'T GONNA BE YOU!!!!!" Duo bellowed.

Everyone turned and looked at Duo. He was breathing heavily ,gripping a mini version of his Gundamn's thermal scythe. He sneered and growled at Relena and the girls. Then he began to run towards them doing the Xena War cry.

Heero took the opportunity that Relena was distracted to escape. He ran past Duo who had now become Xena Warrior Princess and watched him chase Relena's fan club around. The girls were screaming "Protect Relena" as they ran. 

Relena walked towards Heero and grabbed him before he even knew what happened. Heero looked down at Relena and sighed. 

"Don't you ever give up?" Heero asked her. She smiled and shook her head. 

"No, because I know that you really love me and are just playing hard to get." Relena informed him with big stars in her eyes.

"I threaten your life constantly." Heero reminded, "I have pointed a gun to your head countless time. You caught me skrewing another boy silly?" 

"Yes I know." Relena said, "But those are just your little ways of telling me you love me."

"You're delusional." Heero said. 

"GET OFF MY MAN, BITCH!" Duo screamed running towards them. 

Relena screamed and let go of Heero. She began to run around screaming for her life. Heero watched the two and sighed. 

"I thought this would end after the song." Heero said, "Will some one please make it stop." 

As if someone heard Heero's plea, a giant rock fell out of the sky and hit Relena on the head. The rock rolled away leaving Relena flat as a pancake on the grass. Then Relena popped up a bobbed up and down making accordion music. 

Duo ginned wickedly and walked over to Relena. He held his scythe in such a manner that the thermal blade was touching the ground. Then he raised the weapon and yelled out "FOUR!!" as he whacked Relena with the scythe, sending her flying over the horizon. 

When he was sure Relena was gone Duo turned towards Heero. He threw his weapon into hammerspace and walked towards Heero and hugged him.

"Gomen ne, Heero." Duo said, "I didn't mean to overreact about the whole 'them' thing."

"Duo, there is no 'them'." Heero reassured, "Just you." 

"I know." Duo said, "It's just that when Relena's around I always do stupid things."

"What's your excuse when she not around?" Heero asked. 

Duo glared at Heero, who just smirked. He cupped Duo's face in his hand and kissed him gently. Duo smiled under the kiss and held Heero tighter as Heero began to explore his lover's mouth with his tongue. 

Owari 


End file.
